Thabang

Shame

May 16, 2018 • ☕️ 1 min read

“Am I my brother’s keeper?”

Hey, brother — I fear I have failed you. I fear my well intentions were virtue signalling. I fear writing this letter only adds to that misstep. After you left the chat group and I asked why, you told me it was because of all the sensitivity. I didn’t respond. I felt defeated. Now I feel shame.

All those memes and links and videos I spoke against, should I have ignored them? Wrote you directly? Laughed along? I know we open our eyes to things at different times and maybe it wasn‘t my place to pry yours open. But am I not my brother’s keeper?

Brothers at a dinner table. Caption:

I hate to do this, but, think about your sister — think about your unborn daughters and sons. Is this the world you want to craft for them? WhatsApp conversations never end just there, they come into real life, and I don’t want to help you manifest those realities.

See, brother — I love you. I won’t give up on you. I won’t give up on myself. I was once where you are today and I am not that far-off either. There is a great deal of work we need to do on ourselves as men — as black men. I’ll be here to help with yours as I work on mine.